Obesity Discussion Forums

[susan shelly]

Hi Everyone. I'm Susan Shelly, an author working on a book that's geared for teens who are living with obesity. It's not a diet book - it's about teaching teens to be as healthy as they can and to make small changes that can produce significant improvements in health and improve confidence, etc.

I am working with a doctor from Children's Hospital of Philadelphia whose specialty is obesity in young people.

We would like to better understand the concerns of teens and young adults as related to their obesity. The book, which is being published by Facts on File, will include information about dealing with social situations, hygiene, dating, and so forth, in addition to health.

If anyone is willing to work with me to help me gain insights regarding specific concerns and issues, I would very much appreciate the help, and I will make sure that you get a book once it's published. All information will be completely confidential, of course.

Thanks very much for your consideration! Susan

[Obesity Discussion]

Hi there and welcome to the site!!! I'm sure you'll find some people here willing to help. I'll sticky this for you and hopefully you'll get more responses!

[torialeigh]

I might be able to help you. What kind of information do you need?

[Kumquat76]

I'd be willing to help you any way I can. I was obese as a teen. Just let me know what I can do!

[susan shelly]

Hi, and thanks for the reply - I appreciate your help! I'd just like to know what, as a teenager struggling with obesity, you were most concerned about? Little things that you wouldn't necessarily ask someone, because it would be embarassing or awkward. Or concerns like not being able to find clothes like everyone else had (I'm 50 now, but I WELL remember when I was in about 9th grade I wanted to go to a school dance. The "fashion" at that time were these little, slippy, short dresses, and I wanted one SO badly, but couldn't find one big enough - they were all made for juniors. So I had to wear this big dress with a dark blue top and a plaid skirt and, even though my mom told me I looked nice, I was SO uncomfortable and felt so bad about myself!!)

Just things like that . . . anything that might be a concern - health issue, hygiene, dating, friends, exercise, gym class -- whatever.

Best, Susan

You're doing great!! Eight pounds since you started?! Terrific!!

[susan shelly]

Hi torialeigh. I'm not sure how to do this . . . can you read the reply I just sent to Kumquat76? If so, then you know the sort of things I'm looking for (sorry about that big ramble about my dress!!!) If you can read that, would you? But if not, please get back to me and I'll give you more information about the kind of information I'm hoping to get.

Thanks so much!! Susan

[Kumquat76]

I guess just like most teenagers my biggest concern was fitting in.

I was in band all through High School and I remember being terrified of getting fitted for a marching uniform. I just KNEW they wouldn't have one big enough for me. Well of course they did, but I hated getting measured and fitted every year. The band played at all the football games and also marched in parades. I was so scared of marching in my first parade. I didn't know if I could walk that far. And if I couldn't, what was I going to do? I made it all the way to the end, but it took everything I had. My calves were burning, my feet hurt and I was on the edge of tears, but I made it.

I never got to wear any of the fashion fads because, like you said, I never could find one in my size. I had a hard time finding clothes period. Most of the plus size clothes looked like stuff my grandmother wore. One of the greatest things that I found was the men's department. I know that sounds funny, but men's big and tall shops carried clothes more in line with what a teenager would wear. Or at least what I wanted to wear. Polo shirts, t shirts, shorts, etc.

Dating was difficult in high school. I had boyfriends but they would always get teased because they were dating the "fat girl." One of my friends actually paid her older brother to take me to homecoming one year. Talk about humiliating.

One thing that has always bothered me is the way overweight people are portrayed in movies and on television. If someone wants to play a joke on the football team captain, they set him up with the fat girl. Or as a joke the popular girls set the fat girl up to run for homecoming queen. So I projected this on myself. Even when people were generally being nice to me, I usually ignored it out of fear that I was going to become the butt of someone's joke.

Eventually my one saving grace growing up was my own sense of humor. My mother told me to laugh at myself before anyone else got the chance. So I did. *I* started making the fat jokes, and saying funny things about myself being fat. In my experience, in a way it disarms people. After I started making the jokes, I didn't get teased near as often. It may not the most emotionally healty way to deal with things, but it helped me through.

I hope this helps. I know it's random and choppy but I was trying to think of several things to cover. If you have any further questions, or need some more info just let me know.

Thanks,
Tammy

[susan shelly]

Thanks so much, Tammy. I really appreciate you sharing your thoughts. Let's stay in touch, okay, and congrats on the 8 pounds you've lost. One thing that the doctor I'm working with stresses is that little changes are important, and even losing small amounts of weight go a long way to overall health.

Have a great Monday! Susan

[susan shelly]

Hey Tammy. Could you tell me a little about your relationship with food? Did you eat for comfort, do you think? Were you aware that you were overeating? If you feel like sharing, that would be great - if not, no problem! Thanks.

Susan