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Do you ever feel like you are losing your significant others interest??
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08-09-07, 07:24 PM
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#1 (permalink)
| | Small but Loud
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| Do you ever feel like you are losing your significant others interest??
Ok is it just me or what....
I mean I have been with my husband since we were 14, so of course I was smaller then. We have offically been married a bit over a year now. So 11 years of being with the same person. I am trying to lose weight for my self confidence and his interest. But somehow worry that I am not cutting it anymore. I mean since I have been trying to lose this weight I feel he has looked more....but I still worry. I want to be super irrisistable to him.
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08-09-07, 08:33 PM
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#2 (permalink)
| | Administrator
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| Re: Do you ever feel like you are losing your significant others interest??
It's not just a matter of physical stimulation, but mental stimulation as well. A lot of times relationships can get stale from doing the same things over and over and over again. A lot of times all it takes is trying some new things, surprising him when he comes home with a massage while wearing some lingerie for example. Try to add some spice to things and see how that goes!
Regardless, it's hard to keep those butterflies going all those years. Many relationships evolve in other ways.
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08-09-07, 08:37 PM
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#3 (permalink)
| | Small but Loud
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| Re: Do you ever feel like you are losing your significant others interest??
True. I mean I have done everything under the moon in my opinion and just feel like he is "happy" or comfortable. I just did not know if I am feeling this way cause of wanting to lose this weight. You know? 
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08-09-07, 11:01 PM
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#4 (permalink)
| | BMI is for the BIRDS!
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| Re: Do you ever feel like you are losing your significant others interest??
Mini skirts and stripper heels with thigh highs...
This is my suggestion
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08-10-07, 12:11 AM
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#5 (permalink)
| | My dream washboard!
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| Re: Do you ever feel like you are losing your significant others interest??
Quote:
Originally Posted by MikeB  Mini skirts and stripper heels with thigh highs...
This is my suggestion | Michael B!!!!!!! 
Go to your room. 
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Last edited by Merle : 08-10-07 at 12:16 AM.
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08-10-07, 10:21 AM
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#6 (permalink)
| | Small but Loud
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| Re: Do you ever feel like you are losing your significant others interest??
LOL
No that would make him laugh at me. LOL I started wearing 3 1/2 inch heels out when we would go somewhere and I don't think he liked the attention.
I guess my concern is seeing the same body, face and so on.
I mean when we first started dating it was like he could not keep his hands off of me. I mean from any part of my body. But now he does little pinches instead of caressing me. I mean a slap on the butt is WAY different then a pinch. You know?
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Last edited by inlove : 08-10-07 at 10:46 AM.
Reason: added more
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08-10-07, 11:52 AM
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#7 (permalink)
| | BMI is for the BIRDS!
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| Re: Do you ever feel like you are losing your significant others interest??
Hmm, well he was 14 then and he's 25 now, remember that we hit our sexual peak at 18...
__________________
No reason to diet, subscribe to food services, have surgery or take diet pills. Learn to eat right, count calories and exercise. If 400+lb people on Biggest Loser can do it, so can you!
Mike B 6'4" 39 yrs young
**Oct 1 2006 - 310 lbs 40%+ BF ***NEW LOW!!!*** June 8th 2008 - 214.5lbs and dropping!
I had the pain of regret for many years, I now proudly bear the pain of sacrifice.
189lbs LBM last tested Aug 1. 210lbs for 10% BF
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08-10-07, 12:21 PM
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#8 (permalink)
| | Small but Loud
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| Re: Do you ever feel like you are losing your significant others interest??
I agree. That is true. But to have him make me feel sexy is always good.
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08-10-07, 04:35 PM
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#9 (permalink)
| | resident fogey
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| Re: Do you ever feel like you are losing your significant others interest??
Quote:
Originally Posted by inlove Ok is it just me or what....
I mean I have been with my husband since we were 14, so of course I was smaller then. We have offically been married a bit over a year now. So 11 years of being with the same person. I am trying to lose weight for my self confidence and his interest. But somehow worry that I am not cutting it anymore. I mean since I have been trying to lose this weight I feel he has looked more....but I still worry. I want to be super irrisistable to him. | i know he appreciates what you are doing for him, and whether or not you succeed in hitting your goals he should be proud and appreciative that you are trying partially for him.
do not forget that physical is only a part of things. when you are in your 70s or 80s do you really think that physical attraction is going to be that important as it is now? as time moves on your relationship will have to evolve and adapt
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08-10-07, 04:45 PM
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#10 (permalink)
| | Small but Loud
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| Re: Do you ever feel like you are losing your significant others interest??
True. Thanks. I guess since i am somewhat young that guys minds can wonder.....
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08-11-07, 07:16 PM
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#11 (permalink)
| | Newbie
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| Re: Do you ever feel like you are losing your significant others interest??
Men are wired for variety. We are genetically programmed to scatter our seed. So look for variety, not everyday, but once in a while. The 3 1/2 heels might have worked if you had gone further, maybe a wig and some radically different clothes too. A little change works for women, for men we have to feel like we are with someone different. Its not about loving you, its just that genetic survival craving for variety. Try a wig of a different color. Tie him up and blindfold him, and then disguise your voice.
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08-11-07, 07:25 PM
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#12 (permalink)
| | Small but Loud
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| Re: Do you ever feel like you are losing your significant others interest??
I appreciate it. I guess I am paranoid. After 11 years......
I thought I have done everything to keep it going......I mean no complaints from him.......but the worry is always there.
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08-11-07, 09:22 PM
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#13 (permalink)
| | Administrator
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| Re: Do you ever feel like you are losing your significant others interest??
Quote:
Originally Posted by IsaYogi Men are wired for variety. We are genetically programmed to scatter our seed. So look for variety, not everyday, but once in a while. The 3 1/2 heels might have worked if you had gone further, maybe a wig and some radically different clothes too. A little change works for women, for men we have to feel like we are with someone different. Its not about loving you, its just that genetic survival craving for variety. Try a wig of a different color. Tie him up and blindfold him, and then disguise your voice. |  
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08-11-07, 09:49 PM
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#14 (permalink)
| | BMI is for the BIRDS!
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| Re: Do you ever feel like you are losing your significant others interest??
Quote:
Originally Posted by IsaYogi Men are wired for variety. We are genetically programmed to scatter our seed. So look for variety, not everyday, but once in a while. The 3 1/2 heels might have worked if you had gone further, maybe a wig and some radically different clothes too. A little change works for women, for men we have to feel like we are with someone different. Its not about loving you, its just that genetic survival craving for variety. Try a wig of a different color. Tie him up and blindfold him, and then disguise your voice. | If only women understood this...
__________________
No reason to diet, subscribe to food services, have surgery or take diet pills. Learn to eat right, count calories and exercise. If 400+lb people on Biggest Loser can do it, so can you!
Mike B 6'4" 39 yrs young
**Oct 1 2006 - 310 lbs 40%+ BF ***NEW LOW!!!*** June 8th 2008 - 214.5lbs and dropping!
I had the pain of regret for many years, I now proudly bear the pain of sacrifice.
189lbs LBM last tested Aug 1. 210lbs for 10% BF
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08-11-07, 11:21 PM
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#15 (permalink)
| | Small but Loud
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| Re: Do you ever feel like you are losing your significant others interest??
I wish I did. Guess I am more vocal about it then he is. No one else worries about this? Or is it cause I am 26? LOL
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08-12-07, 04:05 PM
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#16 (permalink)
| | Administrator
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| Re: Do you ever feel like you are losing your significant others interest??
Quote:
Originally Posted by inlove I wish I did. Guess I am more vocal about it then he is. No one else worries about this? Or is it cause I am 26? LOL | Women I think are more into the whole romance, special occasion kind of thing too. It couldn't hurt to encourage action on his part too. His favorite dinner cooked for him, plus a nice foot massage after work and maybe a little private show might really get his attention....especially if you do it for no reason. Get things started yourself and hopefully he'll follow suit.
Sometimes communication is key too. A lot of guys don't understand that sometimes even the little things make a big different in the relationship. Leaving a sexy/romantic comment on a sticky note in your car for example. Taking care of all the cleaning including some of the things you normally do. Unexpected shoulder rub. Joining you while you watch a TV show that normally he'd never watch with you. Things like this tend to mean a lot to women from my past experiences, but a lot of guys just don't understand. 
Sometimes they need to be told. A lot of guys aren't mind readers when it comes to the romance stuff....and women want the guys to pick up on subtle signals and hints. We're just not that good at it. We're better at following directions.
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08-12-07, 04:55 PM
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#17 (permalink)
| | Small but Loud
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| Re: Do you ever feel like you are losing your significant others interest??
I agree. Thanks. I have always hoped that he is happy with me and the way things are but always wonder how far to push the envelope. I am totally the way I want him to be....romantic.
I make his lunch and dinner every day. Put notes in his lunches from time to time, and such on.....
I will have to see what I can come up with.
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08-12-07, 04:59 PM
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#18 (permalink)
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| Re: Do you ever feel like you are losing your significant others interest??
Quote:
Originally Posted by inlove I agree. Thanks. I have always hoped that he is happy with me and the way things are but always wonder how far to push the envelope. I am totally the way I want him to be....romantic.
I make his lunch and dinner every day. Put notes in his lunches from time to time, and such on.....
I will have to see what I can come up with. | Have you actually sat down and had a heart to heart talk with him to let him know how you feel about the romance aspect?
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08-12-07, 05:00 PM
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#19 (permalink)
| | Small but Loud
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| Re: Do you ever feel like you are losing your significant others interest??
Yes. Sort of.....
He is who he is....nothing wrong with that. I guess a nice hug at the end of the day would not hurt.
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08-12-07, 05:01 PM
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#20 (permalink)
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| Re: Do you ever feel like you are losing your significant others interest??
Quote:
Originally Posted by inlove Yes. Sort of.....
He is who he is....nothing wrong with that. I guess a nice hug at the end of the day would not hurt. | Like Irving said, relationships need to adapt/evolve/compromise over time to survive.
So what exactly do you mean by "sort of?" 
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