Obesity Discussion Forums

[grneggs]

okay,

recently, the only thing on my mind is my weight. I've always been obsessed with the fact that i'm overweight, but lately, i can't think about anything else. Because, i keep gaining and gaining. the more obsessed i am, the more i'm gaining. I've decided that i'm going to try my best to not think about the BIG issue.
Okay... I need to lose 100lbs. that's a weight where i would be comfortable at. I know all there is to know about most of the diets. I know what needs to be done. My food intake needs to be healthier, and much less than what i eat now, and i need to exercise. I know this, and have known these things for years. about 10 to 15 times a year, i start on a lower calorie diet, and decide that i will increase my activity. I do it for couple of days, then i give up all together. most of my 30 years, i've been emberassed of how i look. and every year, it gets worse and worse. i wish as each year pass, that i had at least enjoyed the previous year, because i was 20 lbs lighter then... or at 18, i was 60 pounds lighter and i really should have enjoyed my looks and body then....
i have a real issue with food. i sneak food... i eat all the time, or if i'm not eating, then i'm thinking about eating. i went to a weight loss doctor 2 months ago, and he prescribed appetite suppressants. Also, he advised me to stick with a 1500 calorie diet. what i noticed was that when i took the pills, i was not hungry, but I ate anyway. Me eating has nothing to do with hunger. i'm addicted to food... i can't break that addiction. i was prescribed another month's pills.. but did not take them the next month, because i realized that i don't need to take the piils to show others that i was trying. really, i was just hurting myself... maybe i need to go see a therapist..
next month is my 31st birthday... another year has gone by, where i have done absolutely nothing about my weight, and is at my highest weight ever. The worst place i've ever been emotionally. i wish i could just get a grasp on this thing.
two days ago, i started school. The first class to many to become a professional. The school thing was a big failure in the past, but i'm so ready to go back to school, and get a profession. so i signed up for a prereq with the local college, and started yesterday. I'm very proud of myself for that. i am thinking that i should try to control my meals better that i'm packing lunch everyday, and is away from home so that i don't have access to my comfort food. i've decided to just cut down on my caloric intake by at least 1000 calories. I think i can do it... because i eat really unhealthy now.. and eat a lot. Also, i will walk 30 mins per day.

Also, i know that me thinking about the 100 lbs is overwhelming.. so i have decided to set my goals on 20 pounds first. So, when i lose that first 20 lbs, then, i will go onto the next 20. i love that i found this forum... i don't know how i found it... but it was time for me to find it, and i did. i have no one to talk to about this issue... because i'm just not comfortable opening up about this to anyone. this is a great way that i can share some of my stress, and thoughts.
thank you...

[Merle]

You may have what is known in the Psychological world as an oral fixation. Have you tried drinking extra water and chewing gum to keep your mouth busy? It helps me to do that.

Have you tried writing a meal plan on paper for yourself? That helps me stick to what I need to be eating.

I also make a shopping list of what I need and only buy that at the store. If its not at my house I wont eat it.

Lastly I put a picture of how I used to look (good) and a picture of how I looked at my worst on the refrigerator. It keeps me from opening the doors to eat when I look at them.

[Obesity Discussion]

Originally Posted by grneggs

okay,

recently, the only thing on my mind is my weight. I've always been obsessed with the fact that i'm overweight, but lately, i can't think about anything else. Because, i keep gaining and gaining. the more obsessed i am, the more i'm gaining. I've decided that i'm going to try my best to not think about the BIG issue.
Okay... I need to lose 100lbs. that's a weight where i would be comfortable at.

Why not set smaller more easily obtainable goals like 10lbs at a time? It's easy to get discouraged trying to tackle 100lbs all at once.

Originally Posted by grneggs

I know all there is to know about most of the diets. I know what needs to be done.

Diets are not a permanent solution though, at the end of the day you have to be willing to commit to a lifestyle change.

Originally Posted by grneggs

My food intake needs to be healthier, and much less than what i eat now, and i need to exercise. I know this, and have known these things for years. about 10 to 15 times a year, i start on a lower calorie diet, and decide that i will increase my activity. I do it for couple of days, then i give up all together.

We need to get you motivated! Do you have a friend/family member that would be willing to do this with you? Maybe at the same time you're trying to do it all at once. Maybe lets introduce eating changes first, get that mastered, and then add the exercise. And when I say add eating changes, not changing everything at once.....I mean a little bit at a time. Remeber, this is a long term effort.

Originally Posted by grneggs

i have a real issue with food. i sneak food... i eat all the time, or if i'm not eating, then i'm thinking about eating. i went to a weight loss doctor 2 months ago, and he prescribed appetite suppressants. Also, he advised me to stick with a 1500 calorie diet.

you can't sneak what you don't buy. have you tried making a shopping list and sticking to it? maybe have someone go with you to keep you from buying bad things? 1500 calories is a decent amount, but maybe work your way down to that instead of going from say 3000 calories to 1500 calories all at once?

Originally Posted by grneggs

what i noticed was that when i took the pills, i was not hungry, but I ate anyway. Me eating has nothing to do with hunger. i'm addicted to food... i can't break that addiction. i was prescribed another month's pills.. but did not take them the next month, because i realized that i don't need to take the piils to show others that i was trying. really, i was just hurting myself... maybe i need to go see a therapist..

This could be underlying depression issues or something else. It couldn't hurt to see someone.

Originally Posted by grneggs

next month is my 31st birthday... another year has gone by, where i have done absolutely nothing about my weight, and is at my highest weight ever. The worst place i've ever been emotionally. i wish i could just get a grasp on this thing.
two days ago, i started school. The first class to many to become a professional. The school thing was a big failure in the past, but i'm so ready to go back to school, and get a profession. so i signed up for a prereq with the local college, and started yesterday. I'm very proud of myself for that. i am thinking that i should try to control my meals better that i'm packing lunch everyday, and is away from home so that i don't have access to my comfort food. i've decided to just cut down on my caloric intake by at least 1000 calories. I think i can do it... because i eat really unhealthy now.. and eat a lot. Also, i will walk 30 mins per day.

Also, i know that me thinking about the 100 lbs is overwhelming.. so i have decided to set my goals on 20 pounds first. So, when i lose that first 20 lbs, then, i will go onto the next 20. i love that i found this forum... i don't know how i found it... but it was time for me to find it, and i did. i have no one to talk to about this issue... because i'm just not comfortable opening up about this to anyone. this is a great way that i can share some of my stress, and thoughts.
thank you...

Cutting intake by 1000 calories depending on where you at normally could be a good start. Make yourself walk. Plan it. Put it on the calendar, or even get someone to walk with.

Good to start with 20lbs or a small goal. We're all here to support you along the way, so please keep us updated!!!

We have tons of other tips too so feel free to ask!

[grneggs]

thank you all for all your supporting words... there hasn't been any changes in what i'm doing. the only thing that has changed is that i want a change more than anything. i started school, and has a lot of things going on.. but nothing i can't handle.. after my initial blog, i was determined to be more aware of what i eat and to reduce my caloric intake. But it didn't happen. i am aware that i eat all the time, and my choices are sooooooooooooo poor. i'll have a healthier meal at home, when all i want to do is to drive to mcdonalds and buy the big mac meal. I am sooooooooo depressed. is this what drug addicts and alcoholics feel like?? like they really want to change, and stop... but can't???? then, why am i so judgemental of those people??? i have so many good reasons to be healthy.. but i'm determined to hurt myself.. i read everyone's blogs here.. and there are so many of you out there that are so determined and are doing what needs to be done. even if its little things, its things to improve the quality of life. i couldn't tell you how many years have gone by where i've been so hateful of me, and how my life is... i haven't been happy in so many years... always this in the background. i was noticing all the pictures in my house. i'm not in any of my pictures... only here and there... my kids are growing up, and there's no real significant envents that i can show where i was present with them. because i hate myself in the pictures. my kids are missing out on a healthy, happy mommy. instead, they get this.. which is not the real, happy me. i don't mean to bring anyone down... reading this will not motivate you guys..and i apologize... but i feel so depressed all the time.. and i really don't have anyone else to discuss this with. i'm so ashamed of myself..

[Obesity Discussion]

Originally Posted by grneggs

thank you all for all your supporting words... there hasn't been any changes in what i'm doing. the only thing that has changed is that i want a change more than anything. i started school, and has a lot of things going on.. but nothing i can't handle.. after my initial blog, i was determined to be more aware of what i eat and to reduce my caloric intake. But it didn't happen. i am aware that i eat all the time, and my choices are sooooooooooooo poor. i'll have a healthier meal at home, when all i want to do is to drive to mcdonalds and buy the big mac meal. I am sooooooooo depressed. is this what drug addicts and alcoholics feel like?? like they really want to change, and stop... but can't???? then, why am i so judgemental of those people??? i have so many good reasons to be healthy.. but i'm determined to hurt myself.. i read everyone's blogs here.. and there are so many of you out there that are so determined and are doing what needs to be done. even if its little things, its things to improve the quality of life. i couldn't tell you how many years have gone by where i've been so hateful of me, and how my life is... i haven't been happy in so many years... always this in the background. i was noticing all the pictures in my house. i'm not in any of my pictures... only here and there... my kids are growing up, and there's no real significant envents that i can show where i was present with them. because i hate myself in the pictures. my kids are missing out on a healthy, happy mommy. instead, they get this.. which is not the real, happy me. i don't mean to bring anyone down... reading this will not motivate you guys..and i apologize... but i feel so depressed all the time.. and i really don't have anyone else to discuss this with. i'm so ashamed of myself..

Remember, you have to be mentally ready to make this committment, because this is a lifestyle change, not some quick fix. It seems that day by day you are getting yourself more geared up for it, but I do not recommend starting until you have your mindset ready to commit. Sometimes it just takes talking things through, and building up a little courage (with the help of our support of course ). Just know that we will all be here for you through the entire process, to support you and cheer you on! Just coming here and understanding what the problems are put you many steps ahead of most. You realize there is something that needs fixing, identified the problem, and are looking to make a change.

Surprisingly, what you are experiencing is similar to what drug/alcohol addicts experience. It's not easy by any means to overcome this, which is why you have us to cheer you on and support you!

You should use your kids as motiviation. I know you want to be there for your kids, and be there for a long time, and see their kids grow up too, and be able to play with all of them.

There is no need to apologize for writing this, because this is exactly why this place exists. A place where people can get whatever off their chests, talk to people enduring similar issues, and get a group of great people behind you to help you achieve your goals in life.

There is no reason for you to feel ashamed, if anything you should feel proud of yourself for taking some of the right steps towards making a better life for you and your kids.

Just let us know how we can help you accomplish your goals.

[Audrey]

Originally Posted by grneggs

thank you all for all your supporting words... there hasn't been any changes in what i'm doing. the only thing that has changed is that i want a change more than anything. i started school, and has a lot of things going on.. but nothing i can't handle.. after my initial blog, i was determined to be more aware of what i eat and to reduce my caloric intake. But it didn't happen. i am aware that i eat all the time, and my choices are sooooooooooooo poor. i'll have a healthier meal at home, when all i want to do is to drive to mcdonalds and buy the big mac meal. I am sooooooooo depressed. is this what drug addicts and alcoholics feel like?? like they really want to change, and stop... but can't???? then, why am i so judgemental of those people??? i have so many good reasons to be healthy.. but i'm determined to hurt myself.. i read everyone's blogs here.. and there are so many of you out there that are so determined and are doing what needs to be done. even if its little things, its things to improve the quality of life. i couldn't tell you how many years have gone by where i've been so hateful of me, and how my life is... i haven't been happy in so many years... always this in the background. i was noticing all the pictures in my house. i'm not in any of my pictures... only here and there... my kids are growing up, and there's no real significant envents that i can show where i was present with them. because i hate myself in the pictures. my kids are missing out on a healthy, happy mommy. instead, they get this.. which is not the real, happy me. i don't mean to bring anyone down... reading this will not motivate you guys..and i apologize... but i feel so depressed all the time.. and i really don't have anyone else to discuss this with. i'm so ashamed of myself..

*hugs*

I think it's always tough starting out loosing weight. I think everyone needs that little bit of success at the start to motivate them, but if you don't get that, it's tough to stick something out if you don't know if it's going to work.

Do you keep a food journal? This can help you keep track of when you're eating, and how much, and how many calories you're eating (I use it to keep track of my exercise too). Go out and buy yourself a little day by day journal with lots of writing room on each day.

Maybe you're like me and you need things in writing. Write out how you feel, write that you're not happy with how things are right now, write what you feel you're missing out on. But don't stop there. Write that you can change, write that you can be happy, write that you have the self control to make things better and be a happy, healthy person.

Another key to helping yourself stick to your new healthy lifestyle, is to just not have the bad stuff in the house. I tried buying healthy stuff for me, and more junk type stuff for my fiance (who could eat three fast food meals a day and still loose weight), but the junk food was too temping. You need to empty your house of all the stuff you know you shouldn't be eating. You need to talk to your family and let them know you're making this commitment, and I'm sure they can feel how unhappy you are, and they'll be ready to help and support you.

I found that if I didn't keep an excess of money in my chequing account, that I wouldn't be as temped to go out for fast food. If you always spend cash there, stop carrying cash. Switch up your routine to exclude the splurges that you know you shouldn't be making.

I have a friend who is trying to drink her 4 bottles (250 ml each) of water everyday. So in the morning, she gets them out, fills them all up, and carries them with her until she's done them, whether this be to work, the gym, out grocery shopping etc. She says sometimes it's a bit heavy, but it reminds her of her weight loss goal, and that she needs to make healthy choices during the day.

Wow, this was a lot of advice. No one expects you to make all these changes overnight. Trying making little goals, like this week I'm going to start my food diary and write down everything I'm eating (even if you splurge and don't know how many calories it is, write it down!). Then next week you could stop drinking soda/whatever and starting drinking your water.

Little steps = Big results!

Please keep us updated. Everyone here is full of great ideas for any problems that may arise, you just need to find the right fit.

[jacqueline]

I am sorry you feel so alone and unworthy! You aren't alone here, that is for sure. This is a great place to find others who have the same issues that you do. Most of all, you should love yourself because your weight isn't who you are. Until you love yourself, you will have a hard time realizing that you have value and are worthy enough to put the time and effort into getting healthy. I bet you spend all of your time doing things for others. Give yourself a hug for me, and then sit down and think of all of the different ways in which you have value. Good luck, I know you can do this for yourself.

[grneggs]

thank you guys so much for all the support... and thanks for some good advise... i go through these ups and downs... i'm feeling much better today.... i really really really want it... i want that healthy lifestyle. i want to be healthy. I am thinking only positive thoughts.. whenever a negative pops up... i knock it down.. .because i'm bringing not only my motivation and self worth down, i'm making others unhappy too... i started writing everything down. i have for the past week and a half. i write down every little thing that goes in my mouth. i haven't changed any eating habbits, but i'm just starting to get an idea as to how much i take in... and its a lot of unhealthy food. i have also realized that i need professional help with my depression. most of the time i'm sad about something... and i think i'll go see a therapist and see what they'll say. i have so many things that i need to get out of my system.
once, i saw a therapist.. and she suggested i go on antidepressants. but i never did.. but it may not be such a bad idea. i don't know.. i'll have to discuss that with the new therapist. i will achieve my goal... if i didn't want this, i wouldn't even be here... i really do want it.. and i am going to get it.
thank you all for all the loving suggestions and support. you guys are the best.

[mclintst]

Hi grneggs,

I have a couple of things that might help you and your situation.

I like you, was addicted to fast food. Mcdonalds was my drug of choice. I had it 3-5 times a week. I knew it was sooooo bad for me and I think that was part of the appeal of it.

Cutting out the junk and fast food right away will just set you up for failure down the road. Instead try reducing the number of time you eat it. If you are having it 4-5 per week, cut it back to 1-2 for the first few weeks. Also when you do eat out, order a hamburger instead of the big mac (ask for it with mac sauce) it tastes the same but you save a ton of calories.

As for the "junk" ie. cookies, chips and chocolate. If you absolutely can't resist it try the "earn it or burn it" approach. If you want to eat those 300 calories you need to burn those calories first through exercise. When you start equating a 500 calorie bag of chips to an hour and a half of brisk walking, suddenly those chips don't look too appealing anymore.

Exercise is great for depression. Start off slow, a 20 minute walk will do wonders. It gives you a chance to clear your head and realize that "hey, I've done something good for myself today".

You've built up those poor eating and exercise habits over a long time and it might take you a while to change them for good. When you do though it is so worth it, I truly can't express in words how good it feels. Just keep at it and you'll get there.

I am new to this place as well, but there are alot of supportive people here that will help you up if you fall. Hopefully I can be one of them.

Lastly, Congrats on that 1 pound weight loss. You should really own that. It's not just a pound, its the first of many more to come off.

Take care,
Steve.

[Obesity Discussion]

Originally Posted by grneggs

thank you guys so much for all the support... and thanks for some good advise... i go through these ups and downs... i'm feeling much better today.... i really really really want it... i want that healthy lifestyle. i want to be healthy. I am thinking only positive thoughts.. whenever a negative pops up... i knock it down.. .because i'm bringing not only my motivation and self worth down, i'm making others unhappy too... i started writing everything down. i have for the past week and a half. i write down every little thing that goes in my mouth. i haven't changed any eating habbits, but i'm just starting to get an idea as to how much i take in... and its a lot of unhealthy food. i have also realized that i need professional help with my depression. most of the time i'm sad about something... and i think i'll go see a therapist and see what they'll say. i have so many things that i need to get out of my system.
once, i saw a therapist.. and she suggested i go on antidepressants. but i never did.. but it may not be such a bad idea. i don't know.. i'll have to discuss that with the new therapist. i will achieve my goal... if i didn't want this, i wouldn't even be here... i really do want it.. and i am going to get it.
thank you all for all the loving suggestions and support. you guys are the best.

Writing things down is a great start. Good work. If you are an emotional eater, then anti-depressants may work.

Originally Posted by mclintst

Hi grneggs,

I have a couple of things that might help you and your situation.

I like you, was addicted to fast food. Mcdonalds was my drug of choice. I had it 3-5 times a week. I knew it was sooooo bad for me and I think that was part of the appeal of it.

Cutting out the junk and fast food right away will just set you up for failure down the road. Instead try reducing the number of time you eat it. If you are having it 4-5 per week, cut it back to 1-2 for the first few weeks. Also when you do eat out, order a hamburger instead of the big mac (ask for it with mac sauce) it tastes the same but you save a ton of calories.

As for the "junk" ie. cookies, chips and chocolate. If you absolutely can't resist it try the "earn it or burn it" approach. If you want to eat those 300 calories you need to burn those calories first through exercise. When you start equating a 500 calorie bag of chips to an hour and a half of brisk walking, suddenly those chips don't look too appealing anymore.

Exercise is great for depression. Start off slow, a 20 minute walk will do wonders. It gives you a chance to clear your head and realize that "hey, I've done something good for myself today".

You've built up those poor eating and exercise habits over a long time and it might take you a while to change them for good. When you do though it is so worth it, I truly can't express in words how good it feels. Just keep at it and you'll get there.

I am new to this place as well, but there are alot of supportive people here that will help you up if you fall. Hopefully I can be one of them.

Lastly, Congrats on that 1 pound weight loss. You should really own that. It's not just a pound, its the first of many more to come off.

Take care,
Steve.

Excellent post.