I don't think I have EVER felt comfortable with myself. I've struggled through the years with being bigger than all of my friends and fmaily. I have four sisters and two brothers. I am the only one that has had a weight problem. I have problems fitting into jeans and I have problems finding the right top to fit my chest. About two years ago, I met up with the wrong people. I had dropped out of school in 6th grade and after the years, I was so lonely that I really needed to find friends. I started using Myspace. Well, I met a guy on there who completely changed my life. I started smoking weed with him alot. That became an everyday thing. It was the only thing I'd spend money on. I could care less about anything else. I just wanted to be high all the time. And, when I was high... I would eat...and eat...and EAT so much. And, I got to be so lazy that I would just lay in bed and sleep all day. Well, It got to the point where I was sick. I had pains in my back and neck. I had a fever every night. I was so depressed and always upset unless I was smoking. And thats when I hit rock bottom. I do believe it is the safest "drug" out there and if you are going to get caught up in anything at all, let it be marijuana and nothing heavier. But, this just wasn't good for me. It became the only good thing in my life. I didn't care about anything else.
I finally decided that it wasn't what I wanted to do anymore. I want to be attractive. I want to be healthy. I want to be confident. And, I want to be myself. I will tell you that I am going to do it occasionally but I will never get sucked back into the way I was. I feel so much better already after 2 months of excersizing and being without.
I just want to ask of everyone on here. Please support me and befriend me. Its really all I need right now. And all of you will have my support right back. Thank you.
-Juliana
