I'm a 16 year old girl suffering from obesity. I'm about 275 pounds. Granted, I have height in my favor (I'm around 5'9 to 5'11) but not nearly tall enough to be as heavy as I am. I've been pretty lucky to stay as healthy as I have. I don't suffer from diseases such as diabetes (yet) and I am fairly active in life. I participate in a marching band and we do have (believe it or not) VERY intense practice schedules.
Unfortunately, I'm addicted to food. I love to eat good food. I like to go out to restaurants and always try new foods. I have a pretty unhealthy diet. I eat a lot of sweets and a lot of salt.
I've recently started my junior year of high school and I've noticed I'm becoming depressed. My grades seem to be spiraling out of control. None of my grades are lower than C's, but I was raised in a family where grades are EXTREMELY important and I'm expected to get straight A's. (Which I haven't since 7th grade.) I'm constantly worried about my grades, constantly worried about my future, constantly worried about college and constantly worried about my weight. Considering the fact that these all weigh 100% of importance in my mind, you can only imagine how stressed out I am getting. I actually recently went to the hospital because I was developing lumps in my throat, which the doctor diagnosed as a symptom of exhaustion.
My parents NEVER leave me alone about my weight. I understand they are concerned, but they are leaving me feeling completely depressed. My dad and I (who is also overweight) started Weight Watchers. He's made incredible progress and while I lost 8 some pounds at the end of the summer, I gained back around 6 since I've started school. I'm just so stressed out.
My mom is not really overweight, but very superficial. Don't get me wrong, my mom is probably the most important person in my life. I love her to death, but she constantly picks about my weight and whenever I want to do something to improve my appearance (whiten my teeth, get a manicure, pierce my ears) she says I "need to work on my weight first." She seems to think I shouldn't enjoy my life or appearance at all as long as I'm still fat.
I want to lose weight so badly. I have so much I want, a boyfriend I REALLY want to date, more friends (I'm not lacking in friends and in fact, the ones I have are completely incredible but more friends could never hurt) and my prom is coming up in April. Being pounds lighter for a nice prom dress would be heaven! But my parents think I have no motive and no want to lose weight when in fact, I think about it constantly.
On top of all of this, being an overweight student isn't easy. People don't tend to be very accepting of very overweight people and I feel like this is another reason bringing me to hate school. I'm at a loss of what to do. I know I'm becoming depressed but I don't even know what to do. I never use to let anything bother me, in fact, I was extremely positive about everything in life. Now, my life is falling apart.
I'm sorry, this was probably a completely pointless post but I needed somewhere to say these things. I need somewhere where I can find help because I know I really need it, I'm losing the joy in my life and I can never find myself feeling truly happy anymore.
