[grneggs]

thank you guys so much for all the support... and thanks for some good advise... i go through these ups and downs... i'm feeling much better today.... i really really really want it... i want that healthy lifestyle. i want to be healthy. I am thinking only positive thoughts.. whenever a negative pops up... i knock it down.. .because i'm bringing not only my motivation and self worth down, i'm making others unhappy too... i started writing everything down. i have for the past week and a half. i write down every little thing that goes in my mouth. i haven't changed any eating habbits, but i'm just starting to get an idea as to how much i take in... and its a lot of unhealthy food. i have also realized that i need professional help with my depression. most of the time i'm sad about something... and i think i'll go see a therapist and see what they'll say. i have so many things that i need to get out of my system.
once, i saw a therapist.. and she suggested i go on antidepressants. but i never did.. but it may not be such a bad idea. i don't know.. i'll have to discuss that with the new therapist. i will achieve my goal... if i didn't want this, i wouldn't even be here... i really do want it.. and i am going to get it.
thank you all for all the loving suggestions and support. you guys are the best.