[pissyinpa]

I thank you for the compliments.
When I had my obesity surgery, it was still the "new" bariatric surgery. I belive the old one was a radical biliopancriatic surgery where most of your large intestine was removed. This caused diarrhea the rest of your life. I thought that was a small price to pay if it did happen, and occasionally, if I eat too much fats I dump still. (NOTHING worse than being in public and that happening too...) BUT the point was, we were told it was a "tool" did we listen, nah, we went out to dinner as soon as we could eat as a group and tested the waters, pushed the limit, how dare anyone tell us we couldn't eat what we wanted and still lose weight. Most did. I had other medical problems that cut that idea short, but I still tried. I have a friend that just lucked into a dr willing to give her a revision on her stoma (the hole going into the pouch). No drs want to do it because of the rate of reciditivy (did I spell that correctly? The rate of failure basically). Her pouch was fine but gorging on foods that weren't chewed enough, the bolus was so big that it got forced through the stoma (this is why they tell you NOT to drink while you eat) and stretched it out. She could eat what she wanted, it dumped into her pouch and went right on through her. She is not losing like she did first time and when the nutritionist told her what he expected her to get down to she balked at him. Now she has hit a plataue (she was 400 first surgery and had all kinds of leg problems, bad ones. She lost down to 229 and she couldn't eat fast enough to get back up there as soon as she could. Honestly I don't remember the exact date but her first surgery , was 2003 I believe. She whines that her legs hurt so she doesn't want to walk. She can't swim because she got MRSA - antibiotic resistant infection- and has had a port to drain the fluids and pus since 1 month after her surgery May 3rd of this year). I was not required to start a new diet before, then her 10yrs later, never mentioned it to me either. Did we listen how other people met and exceeded their goals. NOPE. Know why? The issues WHY we were eating like that were never addressed. I believe that in my heart. Something drives you to abuse yourself. There were nights, I sat in front of the tv after everyone else went to bed- pre op and post op - and stuffed food in my face, that I didn't really want but HAD to have. I HAD to have it! Was there a nutritional reason, no. I would be crying while I was eating it. Like someone was forcing me to do it against my will with a gun to my head. To this day, I can't tell you why.
I just knew, when I got the bomb dropped on me 2hrs before Christmas eve, that I had fought too hard for a second chance at life, to keep living it the way I was. I am starting to see patterns that happened in my life and how I always turned to food. I still crave crap that isn't good for me, too fattening and not nutritionally worth eating.... but I am determined not to fall into that trap. I can get by now adays with a taste of something. If I have to have it that bad I take a bite and hold it in my mouth and let it dissolve. Before I would have wolfed down the whole peice and not really tasted it. Sometimes I will eat half of a slice of pizza when the kids are having it but honestly, now just the bite dissolving inmy mouth is enough. I just needed the taste.
I have had many bad habits/addictions (according to one of the books I was reading about addictions two things are pretty common. 1. we all have a form of OCD, not necessarily like Monk with rituals, but the COMPULSION to eat. and 2. most of us have more than one addicition.... smoking, drinking, porn/sex, drugs.... there are all types of addictions if you are really honest with yourself.) and managed to break all except the addiction to food. I would lose some weight and then put it right back on plus some. I am determined to break the cycle this time. I wish they would talk more about the plans they put the people in Brookhaven on. I want to know if there is psychological counseling and how often they get it? How much physical therapy/exercise do they get? I wonder if they ever sit in their rooms and do the exercise on their own when they aren't "required" to do it? Do they see how large they are, what they really LOOK like? My friend that had the revision was always 40 or more pounds heavier than me and saw herself at my size or smaller!!!
I wonder if they have the opposite of that body dismorphia that anorexics have??? Is that possible? I would like to know what diet they use at Brookhaven. How often they are seen by a dr and do ALL of them end up getting the bypass surgery eventually? I looked up Brookhaven, and what comes up is the hospital, not the clinic and BOY do they push the bariatric surgery!!!
Did anyone see the special about the 1,000 pound man that went back to Mexico and chose the Zone Diet instead of weight loss surgery?
I thought that was great. He is giving himself a shot at learning to do it different. Will he stick to it? I hope they give us updates on him. Will he end up thinking it is too hard and going for the quick fix? Maybe if he did both? I just know if I had kept going the way I was going I could have easily been one of those people at Brookhaven.
Looking forward to hearing from other people that have gone a medical route to lose weight, Via dr. ordered specific diet, inpatient care at weight loss clinic, treatment at an addiction clinic, whatever. Want to know if you learned anything during your treatment that helped you in your weight loss effort? Thanks for having me and hoping to learn a lot from you all......